Skip to main content

Banana Leaf - Broadway

Cuisine: Malaysian
The Down Low: since no one really knows what Malaysian food is, I propose it's an exotic place to take a Valentine's Day date (which is now only a week away). They will have so much trouble reading the menu that they will hardly notice all the stupid things you are saying.
Favorite Dish: The eggplant fries with Thai chili sauce
Music Pairing: if you are listening to music then your date is probably not going so well, but if you are desperate for some tunes to fill the awkward silences, throw on Porter Robinson's Essential Mix. It is one of the most attractive things I have ever heard and it will completely drown out any unwanted conversation.

Looking to expose an aura of culture and sophistication to impress that special someone on Valentine's Day? Japanese, Thai, Korean and Chinese are all too common in Vancouver, so why not make a reservation for Malaysian and leave him / her too intrigued to turn you down. Hardly a risky bet, as the food is not that different than many other Asian cuisines. Maybe a bit spicier, but it is Valentine's Day, you want your date's heart racing and mouth watering. Be extra considerate and bring some tissue for your partner's runny nose...unless you are into that type of stuff. Careful eating there alone on Valentine's Day though, as your tears and sniffling may draw looks of pity from happy couples nearby.

Instead of cliche rose petals, ask the kitchen for some leftover banana leaves to cover your bed at the end of the night


a 9 Course tasting menu for $33 may be just as disorienting as a bottle of vodka

Totally understand if you are reluctant to share too many of your eggplant fries. No date is worth the sacrifice

Order the mussels to compensate for the muscles you may not have.

With all the restaurant options in Vancouver, I have just helped with the toughest part of Valentine's Day. Now it's up to you to find a date.

Tasty (or wet) dreams,

JB

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Brunch in Vancouver - Feast vs. Catch 122 vs. Nero Belgian Waffle Bar

Cuisine: Basic B*tch The Down Low: The only thing you have to worry about at brunch is the night before having a couple of sodas and breaking it down too low on a dance floor Favorite Dish: Anything with maple syrup (but the avocado toast at Feast is a close second) Music Pairing: I am probably grooving to some electro the night before, so I will keep the party going at brunch and suggest Above & Beyond at Ultra Music Festival . This post has just caught the attention of every lady in the city wearing Hunter rain boats, reading in Oprah's book club and watching season 35 of Grey's Anatomy. And I cannot forget all the gentlemen in the city rocking a pony tail, puffing on a vape and being dragged around by the ladies wearing Hunters. I spend most of my weekends in Calgary, so I admit to not being well-versed in the field of top Vancouver brunch spots. When I do wake up with a headache Saturday / Sunday morning in in the city, I am normally looking for the shortest lin

Phnom Penh - Chinatown

Cuisine: Cambodian / Vietnamese The Down Low: Just for the food, I give Phnom Penh top marks in Vancouver. Can it be dethroned? Favorite Dish: No one I have talked to about Phnom Penh knows anything about the menu aside from the butter beef and the chicken wings. But when you have found perfection, why take a risk with anything else. Music Pairing: Another one of my Anjunabeats' favorites, Oliver Smith at ABGT250 . He just released a new track called Lovingly which is featured in the set. Vietnamese? Cambodian? Chinese? A bit of an identity crisis Cambodia and Vietnam are in my opinion two of the world's great countries, with food contributing highly to that ranking. While working in Southeast Asia for six months last year, I had the opportunity to visit Siem Reap and Phnom Penh with my family. Unfortunately the only time I ever got sick was while visiting Angkor Wat, and it definitely was caused by something I ate the morning of. Although puking before running int

Rodney's Oyster House - Yaletown

Cuisine: Seafood The Down Low:  All the boat decorations almost make you feel sea sick after sitting through a big meal. Although it’s more likely the lobster poutine and beers will be to blame, as opposed to the décor. Favorite Dish:  New England Clam Chowder on the West Coast Music Pairing: Alpha 9 in Miami for a State of Trance   Walking into Rodney’s is like walking into a rustic, seaside bed and breakfast. The old lady running the B&B was a decorator in the city before retiring to the coastal village. A lot of thought has gone into making the place 'authentic.' She loves the sea and especially the sea-men. "Wait, what?" That's right, let's address the whale in the room. There are sexual undertones dotting the place. You'd really have to like oysters to confidently wear this shirt in public ...and now I am sexualizing a perfectly normal oyster shucking picture. The old lady at the B&B has me in her trap. Watch ou